


Once Upon A Diplomatic Mission

by pashmina



Category: Chronicles of Narnia (Movies), Chronicles of Narnia - All Media Types, Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Badass!Pevensies, Edmund breaking out of jail, F/M, Ladies saving themselves (and others), Lucy stealing Hook's leather jacket, Pirate Queen!Lucy, Susan answering riddles, Tired!Peter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-18
Updated: 2014-07-18
Packaged: 2018-02-09 11:12:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,521
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1980771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pashmina/pseuds/pashmina
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>And once again, the four monarchs are left wondering where in the world do these odd people come from? And why must they constantly be after Narnia, instead of, say, Calormen?</p><p>Written for Narnia Fic Exchange 2013</p>
            </blockquote>





	Once Upon A Diplomatic Mission

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Narnia Fic Exchange 2013  
>  **Prompt:** What I want: Not too much angst; some humour, snark; happy ending; Pevensies, Narnia; minimal romance  
>  Prompt words/objects/quotes/whatever:  
> (Feel free to pick and choose)  
> \- I’ve been looking for a good crossover with Once Upon a Time and haven’t managed to find any, so would love to see some. Prompts: 1) Peter and/or Edmund, and Prince Charming, on kingship/ruling/being commoner-turned-royal; 2) Lucy and Red Riding Hood, running with wolves; 3) Snow White and Susan, archery ; 4) any character from both universes, curses, destiny, waiting for a saviour/being saviour; 5) or just run with the crossover and do whatever you want  
> \- Even if you don’t want to write a crossover, feel free to use any part of those prompts for just Narnia instead  
> \- “Edmund was engaged in long overdue shuttling diplomacy…to assure all that […] Narnia had no intention of turning other heads of state into barnyard animals” – rthstewart, Lost in Translation. I would love to see a fic elaborating the diplomatic issues that would arise after the incident of Rabadash the Ass.  
> \- Golden Age/AU where they don't leave: Pevensies being badass and awesome monarchs  
> \- Pevensies from outsider point of view  
> \- World-building in Narnia and/or the world beyond 
> 
> What I definitely don't want in my fic: Slash, incest.

**Title:** Once Upon a Diplomatic Mission  
 **Author:** TiaBolt _[aka tungsten_illusionist]_  
 **Rating:** T  
 **Content/Warnings:** Nothing more dangerous than a bit of light flirting.  
 **Summary:** And once again, the four monarchs are left wondering where in the world do these odd people come from? And why must they constantly be after Narnia, instead of, say, Calormen?  
 **Author's notes:** _Damoiseau_ is french for the male equivalent of a damsel.  
 **Prompt:** What I want: Not too much angst; some humour, snark; happy ending; Pevensies, Narnia; minimal romance  
Prompt words/objects/quotes/whatever:  
(Feel free to pick and choose)  
\- I’ve been looking for a good crossover with Once Upon a Time and haven’t managed to find any, so would love to see some. Prompts: 1) Peter and/or Edmund, and Prince Charming, on kingship/ruling/being commoner-turned-royal; 2) Lucy and Red Riding Hood, running with wolves; 3) Snow White and Susan, archery ; 4) any character from both universes, curses, destiny, waiting for a saviour/being saviour; 5) or just run with the crossover and do whatever you want  
\- Even if you don’t want to write a crossover, feel free to use any part of those prompts for just Narnia instead  
\- “Edmund was engaged in long overdue shuttling diplomacy…to assure all that […] Narnia had no intention of turning other heads of state into barnyard animals” – rthstewart, Lost in Translation. I would love to see a fic elaborating the diplomatic issues that would arise after the incident of Rabadash the Ass.  
\- Golden Age/AU where they don't leave: Pevensies being badass and awesome monarchs  
\- Pevensies from outsider point of view  
\- World-building in Narnia and/or the world beyond 

What I definitely don't want in my fic: Slash, incest.  


* * *

  
Queen Lucy, at the tender age of 19, knew that she was considered to be quite pretty. Not the intimidating beauty of her sister, but a pleasant figure and entrancing nature, nonetheless. What she did not realize, was that this very quality warranted such crude words from the scruffy-bearded man before her. The seafaring queen was quite sure she'd be outraged at his base assertations if she wasn't so very busy trying to escape the bonds on her wrists.  
"Oh you look _very_ lovely squirming in your chair like that," said the self-proclaimed Captain Kilian Jones. He was leaning languidly against a stack of crates while appreciating the fine beauty before him. Had Regina told him this lovely number and her beautiful ship would be involved, he would have helped her without a demand for compensation.  
Lucy didn't bother with maintaing a formal, "queenly," facade-something Susan would admonish her for before giving a lecture in the strength of appearances- and rolled her eyes in the direction of the pirate. Dealing with pirates wouldn't be so problematic if she didn't have somewhere _very important_ to be soon.  
She sighed. Assuring the Calormens that Narnia was not planning to storm their land, turning everyone into cattle and the like to increase their food industry would have to wait.  


* * *

  
High King Peter the Maginificent was displeased. So displeased that he wore his most royal frown as he glared at the oddly dressed man in a hat. Archenland was only a day's ride from Narnia and to be caught unawares was highly embarassing. He could only hope that Edmund never found out, or he would never hear the end of how constant vigilance was _always_ neccessary and that if he wasn't going to look out for himself could at least keep a guard, even if they hid in the shadows, actually that might be better, _please_. To top off his rather dismal situation, his head was aching-most likely from the rather excessive force the other man had applied to the back of his neck. Not to mention how sore his muscles were still from his campaign in the North.  
"I'm a little sorry about this, you know," the Hatter said, hating the silence that seemed to stretch forth endlessly, "But I have a family to take care of."  
"Don't we all," was Peter's only reply. And the silence continued.  


* * *

  
"So let me get this straight," Edmund began, speaking with all the imperious tone he could manage while standing in his _own_ dungeons. "You, and three of your friends, have come here to get rid of myself and the other monarchs to take control of Narnia?"  
"Yes," Regina replied, her voice both sultry and knowing. "I've been watching for quite some time and this kingdom seems perfect for my rule."  
"Yes, Narnia is quite nice I suppose," the Just King mused aloud, mind whirring as he carefully chose his words. "But why not Calormen? They're much larger and have more gold."  
"And risk being assassinated because of my magic? I'm not an idiot, boy," She spat in reply before turning and leaving the dungeons, the slightest scent of lilac left behind. Edmund simply sat down in his cell, dark eyes flitting about the small space, trying to determine a method of escape.  
 _It's always the beautiful older women with magic_ , he rued, before picking up what seemed like the remains of an old knife.  


* * *

  
"Three riddles, dearie, and I'll let you free," Rumple announced, giggling in that eerie way of his. His entire persona radiated a sense of madness and chaos which would have been deliciously inviting if she wasn't the Gentle Queen who _just wasn't into that sort of thing._ Susan sighed impatiently. The crazy man before her had appeared in her tent, _completely unannounced, how rude_ , and held her hostage using magical binds. Now, while her brother was considered the master of words, Susan did quite well herself. Surely with a few sugar-coated words he would release her.  
Although his scaly countenance and tendency to monologue, combined with her tiredness from her annual tour of the South (which had extended into a trip to see the lands bordering their kingdom and letting them know of the events which had recently occurred involving herself and an ass), had quite diminished her patience to think her words through. In the end, after he watched her make a series of disgusted expressions with mild amusement, Queen Susan replied a terse affirmative.  
He laughs again, and Susan really think she laughs entirely too much, more irritated that she cannot understand what could possibly funny about their situation, when he suddenly stops, observing her carefully. The man's eyes linger on her dark hair, the pale skin, the blue eyes almost the way a lover's would, had the Gentle Queen believed him to be capable of such emotion. Which she doesn't.  
"You look like my failures," he finally says, and she wonders if this is meant to be a riddle.  
"Do I?" she replies archly, "Your failures must have been quite beautiful, then." And he laughs and the sudden moment of genuine feeling, more terrifying than his appearance, passes and Susan can breathe more easily, relatively speaking, of course.  
The regal queen could only hope that her brothers and sister are able to complete their diplomatic missions.  


* * *

  
"How does a tetracrchy even work?" Red asks, more curious about the strange ruling system that the Blue Fairy had briefly explained than anything else. Rescuing damsels and _damoiseau_ in distress was not uncommon at all in her life, but a kingdom with four rulers instead of two was bewildering. And they were all siblings-how on earth did they decide who inherited the kingdom?  
"Doesn't matter," David ( _James,_ he mentally corrects himself though he's not even sure how it matters since everyone just calls him Charming) replies, sheathing about a half-dozen swords in various places along his body. He considers bringing his helmet, because curse it all, he does not want to be hit in the head _again_.  
But before he can pick it up, Snow arrives, holding up the bean the Fairy had given, speaking quickly. "We're all going to be transported to locations where we're needed most. And since we know next to nothing about this place...we'll have to improvise. Ready?"  
And without so much as a by your leave, the bow-wielding queen threw the bean between the three heroes. The vortex grew, its blue glow overshadowing the dim torches of the weapons room. Snow looked at her companions, nodded sharply and jumped in, shortly followed by her Charming- who liked keeping close so that it wouldn't be so hard to _find_ her all the time. Red rolled her shoulders and jumped as well, hoping the land to have a full moon night as she twisted in the portal and removed her red cloak.  


* * *

  
The captain had long left to, well, captain the ship, and from where Lucy sat she could occasionally hear the playful yet authoritative bark of an order. The man had an oddly charismatic persona-necessary to be a pirate she supposed. And yet, the young queen mused, eyeing the two guards left to keep watch her, she was charismatic as well. In fact, were she to place a bet, not that she placed bets often, Lucy was quite sure that she could convince his crew to follow her instead.  
There was a reason Edmund had been adamant to send her to Calormen.  
"Excuse me," she called out lightly, her voice melodic and pleasant. The taller of the men shifted, watching her with a look of caution. Lucy wondered what exactly Captain Kilian had told his men for them to suspect her so. The shorter of the men however came forward, grinning crudely. "Yes, girlie?"  
Her blue eyes, wise beyond their years, shone with an innocent, mischevious sparkle.  
"Would either of you men or your crew mates be interested in a mutiny?"  


* * *

  
Peter watched with a mix of amusement and curiosity when the Hatter dragged in another man, also blonde and blue-eyed and clutching his head, and threw him next to the still tied up king of Narnia. Peter was beginning to think the odd man had a type. Still, being the chivalrous knight that he was, he assisted the man into a sitting position as best one could with their hands tied up.  
David groaned. He _knew_ he should have taken the helmet. Not to mention the embarassing position of being just as helpless as the monarchs he was supposed to rescue. He turned his head, trying to focus on the blurry figure next to him, before speaking, half-mumbling, "Prince Charming, at your service, your majesty. I promise I'm usually better at this rescuing business, but to be fair I'm not technically a born royal."  
The king nodded at the introduction, deperately trying to remember which king's son this man was and how on earth was he named Charming, when his last few words caught his attention. As far as he was aware, no other kingdom had royalty who were not born into their roles. In that aspect, Narnia was once again the odd one out. Looking around and deciding that he had better wait until his new companion was in better shape, especially since he didn't know his fighting style like he knew Edmund's, Peter simply nodded.  
"I'm High King Peter the Magnificent," he said, regretting the "Magnificent" when Charming shot him an incredulous look. "I thank you for your kind intentions, Prince Charming. Unfortunately it seems we are trapped for the time being."  
He paused.  
"It's different isn't it. Not being born royal. There's so much more to prove to yourself-and yet, I understand my people for I have been in that position."  
Charming nodded. "And the clothes are so much more uncomfortable."  
Peter couldn't help but laugh. "You should really try Narnian clothes. Even are fanciest are-"  
"Shut it!" snapped the Hatter, displeased with a conversation he in which he could not participate. The two royals became quiet, but a slanted glance and both were snickering like schoolboys. The Hatter sighed, wondering if such immaturity was part of not being born royal as well.  


* * *

  
"What walks on four legs in the morning, two in the afternoon, and-"  
"A Human."  
"What do women want most?"  
"Easy. Their own free will."  
"What do _I_ want most?"  
"....."  
"What happened, dearie? No quick reply? _What do I want most?_ "  
"I....I don't know."  
"......neither do I, dearie. Neither do I."  


* * *

  
Edmund had just managed to fit in the knife pieces in just the perfect way to pick the locks of his own dungeons, making a mental note to improve security, because it really shouldn't be that easy to break out, when there was a flash of light _a giant wolf appeared out of nowhere_ , and really, the young king thinks he can be forgiven his manly yelp given his past with wolves.  
He was reconsidering actually turning his makeshift key, when the wolf, who curiously enough had been holding a red cloak in its mouth, tossed the cloth up in the air. As it landed on the creature's back, the beast shuddered, and before Edmund's eyes, transformed into a young, quite lovely, woman.  
"Red," she says as introduction, a trace of amusement evident in her eyes. His yelp had been quite loud. "I'm here to help defeat the evil queen."  
Somewhere he thinks Aslan must be playing some kind of joke, and this must be what it feels like to be on the recieving end of heroic presence that knew it was heroic.  


* * *

  
Surprisingly enough, the man disappeared soon after his enigmatic words. Not knowing must have been the correct answer to his riddle, Susan assumed, before she quickly moved grabbed parchment, quill and ink to send a message to her brother back at the castle. The raven had just left her tent when a woman, skin snow white, ruby red lips, entered her tent, bow drawn.  
Susan had had _quite enough_ of strangers barging into her tent, and immediately drew her own bow, which had been leaning against her cot.  
"What do you want?" she asked, tone deadly serious.  
The woman lowered her bow. "You're...you're fine. I thought I'd have to rescue you."  
Susan decidedly didn't lower hers, not ready to decrease her suspicion just yet.  
"I can do that quite fine on my own, thank you."  
"Your highness," the other woman began, either ignoring the arrow pointed at her, or unbothered by it, "Your siblings are in danger. We have to get to the others. Where is your brother?"  
It's only once they're both riding on gryffins following the route Peter took, the other woman sporting a gleeful grin, that Susan realizes they've introduced themselves to each other.  


* * *

  
Bolts of purple flying around them, his sword isn't enough and once again he's stuck in a place where everything he does isn't enough and Aslan's roar there isn't even a wand he can break. He's no more a boy, he can fight as good as Peter, better even, why can't he defeat another witch come to steal his home, it's his home, his and his people's, and he will defend it with everything he has and more because his life is worth less than the stone beneath his feet, less than the faint scent of salty sea air wafting through the window. His name is Edmund and he is the Just King, and he will see that this woman recieves justice. He will not kill her, even if the beautiful, strong wolf beside him wants to sink her teeth into the delicate yet firm flesh of the witch's neck, because she has not killed his people. She is good enough to leave them in slumber while they fight, flashing swords, glinting teeth, and glowing bolts, measured grunts, feral growls, and frustrated shrieks. This is Narnia and it is _his_.  


* * *

  
The Hatter falls before them, hissing in pain, two arrows lodged in his shoulder. Peter recognizes the red fletched arrow easily, sighing in relief that he no longer has to listen to the incoherent babbles of the concussed Prince Charming. Even if he thinks that given the right scene, the two could have been excellent friends.  
"Peter!" Susan calls in relief while _Snow White_ , she finally did learn her name, rushes to her husband. The woman is strong, half carrying the prince while Peter rubs his numb wrists. Peter's horse is still standing and the four rulers, ignoring the input of the prone Hatter, determine how best to return home.  
It is finally settled that Snow will ride the horse, with the Prince, who seems to be in better shape, and the Hatter tied up behind them. Peter and Susan will ride the gryffins.  
"So...you were caught," Susan says mischeviously as they both swing legs over their mounts' saddles. Neither have Edmund's talent for riding the winged creatures. Peter sighs and doesn't answer. He'd forgotten that Susan was just as good at being smug.  


* * *

  
Red is so surprised when Rumplestiltskin arrives at the castle, she nearly trips over her paws as she sets up to leap upon Regina. But the man arrives, and she can see the dark-haired king out of the corner of her eye, sizing up the new threat. And she likes that about him, how he doesn't begin running towards the man immediately, how he thinks before acting, _how he stands right next to the word twisting man of magic?_  
She doesn't take Rumple's fighting Regina very well to say the least, and the sound of breaking windows would have irritated her further, had a flurry of arrows not preceded it. Snow could always be depended on to fight both Regina and Rumple, and Red once again threw herself into the fray, leaping over stone status come alive. A closer look revealed a woman similar in looks to Snow, snow white skin, ruby red lips, but not quite her. Red wasn't about to question her allies, though she caught a bewildered glance at her current bestial figure.  
With the, _one, two, three, four and five as Snow herself entered with Charming close behind_ , they had a chance, and no she still was not counting Rumple, even if, _fine_ , it was easier when he countered her magic.  
There was a beautiful synchronicity between the queens, kings, wolf and sorcerer, one Regina was helpless against. Encircled by them, she had no choice but to lower her hands, though she refused to lower her head. Perhaps taking over a kingdom in another world had been one of her less intelligent ideas, but it would have worked, if not for those meddling royals. And stupid Rumple who tagged along with her group for no sane reason whatsoever.  
"Why?" and the words broke the silence of heaving breaths. Susan was looking towards Rumple with narrowed eyes.  
With a grin more cheeky than frightening, he replied, "I don't know."  
And really, no one else had the heart to question him further.  


* * *

  
If there was anything Lucy had learned in this entire fiasco, it was that mutiny was fun when you were the one inciting it. She had not left her post at the helm, even after her brothers and sister and four strangers arrived with two other strangers in binds behind them to discuss the how the foreigners would return home. After all, the Valiant Queen had her own prisoner to look after.  
"You look quite _dashing_ in my coat," the crude man drawled, having not ceased his flirtations for even a moment. Although there was more genuine admiration in his voice than before. The pirate had to appreciate the cleverness of his opponent.  
"I do like it," Lucy admitted, finding the leather edgy and relishing the memory of the look on Susan's face when her sister had first caught sight of her. "And I'm going to keep it, if you don't mind. This was so much _fun._ "  
"There's a bit of pirate in you, lassie," and for once Kilian wasn't just flattering with false words. Lucy's delighted grin was reward in itself for his compliment. The younger woman bowed graciously, before running towards her family. And if Kilian wasn't imagining it, his crew seemed almost sad to see the vivacious girl go.  
"Goodbye!" she called excitedly from the docks, and her crew raised their hands in farewell. Edmund simply rolled his eyes, while Peter looked confused and Susan frowned. The three eldest had decided that while perhaps a feast of thanks was in order, it would have been best for their allies to leave, because who knew how long Rumplestiltskin's good will would last.  
Lucy only wished she could have seen the young woman turn into a wolf like her brother had mentioned when introducing the strangers. The four watched as the ship took sail, and the sorcerer threw something small into the ocean. The sudden vortex in their waters was disconcerting, but after a rather long day, none of the kings or queens seemed particularly surprised. The ship and its people vanished, and everything in Narnia was.... _Narnia_ once more.  
"So," Edmund asked, as they made their way back to their castle, with it's half-destroyed throne room. Tired, weary, with only a bubbly Lucy walking with a skip in her step. "Did any of you get a chance to complete your diplomatic missions?  


* * *

  
**_FIN_ **

**Author's Note:**

>  _Damoiseau_ is french for the male equivalent of a damsel.


End file.
